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”...nothing he could see, maybe only make-believe...”

So she took a paper napkin off the bar,
spit on it, and told him to hold still
while she carefully lifted his glasses,
leaving him half blind, and wiped
something off just above his left
cheekbone. "There," she said, handing
him back his glasses, "I got it," and even
with his glasses on, what she showed
him was nothing he could see, maybe
only make-believe. He thought, "Better
get out of here before it's too late," but
suspected too late was what he wanted.

- Philip Levine, from "Of Love and Other Disasters", collected in News of the World.

Interesting to note that The New Yorker published a slightly different version of this poem, which changed a handful of words here and there, most notably that "suspected" in the final line, for which the magazine version substituted "knew." The change of just one word leads to significantly different meanings. I prefer "suspected" - it suggests the man doesn't know exactly what he wants, but realizes that his worst impulses will probably lead him somewhere or with someone he shouldn't. And he's going there anyway.

Incidentally, while Barnes and Noble's selection usually leaves much to be desired, during a visit this weekend to the Bolingbrook store I was quite pleased to find and browse through both this Levine book and William Carlos Williams' Paterson.

November 5, 2018 in Books | Permalink