The Epitaphs of P.D.Q. Bach

All these epitaphs and elegies of Edgar Lee Masters I've been reading remind me of two considerably more light-hearted epitaphs of P.D.Q. Bach, the fictional, "last and certainly least" child of Johan Sebastian Bach, as imagined by the wonderfully satirical mind of Peter Schickele in The Definitive Biography of P.D.Q. Bach. P.D.Q. was, to put it kindly, a ne'er-do-well, a drunkard, a lecher, a sloth who would rather exploit his family's vast musical legacy by creating a highly dubious - but of course very hilarious - body of "musical" works than earn an honest living. When P.D.Q. finally died of some deplorable causes I can't quite recall, his drunken friends buried him in a makeshift grave, beneath the following words:

Here lies a man with sundry flaws
And num'rous sins upon his head.
We buried him today because
As far as we can tell, he's dead.

The Bach family, despite what (deservedly) little they thought of this most prodigal of sons, soon had him disinterred and relocated to an audacious, marble-pillared mausoleum, memorializing him with this comparatively flowery inscription:

He lies in death, as lie he did in life;
Oblivious to worldly cares and strife.
No base ambitions rile his sodden brain,
And odious ambition waits in vain
For him to rise. Sweet Gabriel, play on!
You'll nothing rouse, except perhaps a yawn.
For P.D.Q. will waken when he will.
And even God must wait that day until.

As much as I like that one, I think I like the guttural simplicity of the first one best.